Dear Tilda.  I love you so much.  I just wanted to watch you while you slept. 
(Cornelia Parker - 'The Maybe' (2005))
Found at Piet Mondriaan

I knew those storms would be useful for something. 
(Eugenie Scarse- 'Truncated Trunk' (2009))
Found at piet mondriaan

The O-Week prank got a little out of hand.

(Daniel Arsham - 'Sheet' (2007))

Found at i like this art

Just because I am a tree doesn't mean I can't be an artist too!
(Letha Wilson - 'Hanging Wall in Hemlock Tree' (2009))
Found at today and tomorrow

Um ... I forgot what day it was.
(On Kawara - from the Today Series (1966 & 1978))
Seen at Dia:Beacon

My doodles ponder the absurdity of contemporary art.  I sell them for $1000.

(David Shrigley - various illustrations) 

Oh my! I got a little quite smashed on the bubbly stuff today ... 
- 555kgs of pulverized champagne bottles. 
(Alicja Kwade - '412 Lieter bis zum Anfang' (2008))
Found at today and tomorrow

Shit!  I think I just tore a hole through that painting!
(Lucio Fontana - 'Concept Spatieale' (1959) & 'Concepto Spatiale' (1964))

Tiger, you can play my front 9 and my back 9 you dirty little schmooka! 
18+ only - The collage is made out of porn (i dare you to look zoooooooom ... )


(Jonathan Yeo - '18 Holes (Tiger Woods)' (2010))
Found at LAZ.inc


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This ceiling sure tastes good.
(Fred Muram - 'Kissing the Ceiling' (2008))
Found at today and tomorrow

I just wanted to get high.
(Werner Reiterer - 'Beginnings of space travel')
Found at today and tomorrow

De  Light ... get it?  It's a post-ironic pun.  Totally conceptual.
(Brigitte Kowanz - 'Delight')
Found at today and tomorrow

When the insurers call ... let's just call it art eh?
(Daniel Adam Turner - 'Sp. 1' (2007))
Found at today and tomorrow

I'm just a chair who likes to breakdance.
(Joshua Longbrake - 'Untitled')
Found at today and tomorrow

What do you mean what do I mean?  My art is totally comprehensionable!

(Kaspar Sonne - 'mean' (2007))

Found at today and tomorrow

I always wanted my work to disappear into the mundanity of the everyday.
(Fred Lebain - Un printemps à New York (a Spring in New York))
Found at todayand tomorrow

Justin Bieber's latest single finally succumbed to the fate it so deserved.
(Brian Khek - 'CD')
Found at i like this art

He deeply regretted bringing his kid to work today.
(Jan Vormann - works from Dispatchwork series)
Found at today and tomorrow

My art's like totally conceptual you know
(Homer, various graffiti works)
Found at today and tomorrow

everything from last night is a blank ... 
(Robert Ryman,'Varese Wall' (1975)) - yep - it's a BIG white canvas ... 
Seen at Dia:Beacon

I can't quite remember what happened last night ... 
(Tracey Emin - 'My Bed' (1999)'
Via the Saatchi Gallery

Ok. I'm going out with all of my friends now.
(Gareth McConnell, 'The Fourth Universalist Society, New York, NY 10023' (2005))
Read in the journal

I was walking home from Ikea with my brand new Sävern     mirror and I was like inspired or something.

(Bruce McLean, 'Mirror work' (1969))

Wow! That mine can really stand still!
(Christian de Vietri, 'Simon' (2005) and 'Tim' (2006))
Seen at Primavera 06 and Contemporary Australian Optimism

Lady Gaga melted into her metallic dress under the intense heat of stage lighting.
(Lynda Benglis - 'Quartered Meteor' (1969))
Found at artnet

I just want to go to the beach!!!
(Blue Curry - (what a name) - 'Like Taking Sand to the Beach'(2006)

No one seemed to notice the forgotten drill bits strewn across the floor.
(Adel Abdessemed, 'Pluie Noire' (2005))
Seen at palazzo grassi

Um ... a little help would be nice!
(Maurizio Cattelan, 'Untitled' (2007))
Found at New Museum

The 'exit' sign gave mixed signals.  To 'exist' or exit into the dark abyss below?
(Stephen Rosenthal, 'Exist')
Found at rubricjournal

The house began to pry itself from Christo’s bondage … Escape was in sight!
(Hertl (Austria) - 'Achinger House')
Found at @KalinaMariaD and Yellowtrace